


we don't need another intern (shatterdome)

by artyartie



Category: Pacific Rim (2013), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Canon Blending, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Gen, Genderswap, Sorry Not Sorry, and realizing jane and darcy would make an amazing genderbent hermann and newton, and this is what happens, pair loki's protecting instinct in thor 2, plus reading the entire hermann gottlieb tag in three days
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-07
Updated: 2014-08-24
Packaged: 2018-02-12 04:16:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2095434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artyartie/pseuds/artyartie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dr. Jane Foster is trying to finally close the Breach, all while not killing former intern/resident Kaiju groupie/inconsiderate labmate Darcy Lewis - and dealing with the bittersweet return of former Jaeger pilot Thor Odinson into her life.</p><p>Clearly, there's a major life crisis and an apocalypse that needs cancelling.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: Though there's another series demanding my attention, this plot bunny latched on with the fury of a Category 5 Kaiju and demanded to be written.  It is a bit crack-ish in its premise, but taken seriously enough (?!).  Striker Eureka and Cherno Alpha are pilot-swapped, but the Wei triplets, Tendo, and of course, Stacker Pentecost and Mako Mori are still there.**

**The story is fairly gen, but I am not at all opposed to putting on new lenses and/or squinting. :)**

  

* * *

 

Hong Kong International Airport

January 2, 2025

 

Jane knew how foolish she must have looked.  Cane in hand, drowning in her faded green parka, worn-out PPDC duffel at her feet.  The rain, falling more persistently now, glistened on the edge of the fur trim, making it smell like whatever animal it had been, long ago.

Hong Kong in winter, even in this cold snap on the heels of a northeast monsoon, was hardly Vladivostok, but the parka kept out the cold.  So it also kept a lot of complicated memories in, but it was a trade off she was willing to make.

“Get a ride in with the Sydney Shatterdome,” she muttered, tapping at the glistening sidewalk.  “Things are bad if we’re down to carpooling.”

A non-descript green van came to a screeching halt at the curb.  The window rolled down, and as Darcy Lewis, with another damned kaiju inked on her arm, waved at Jane and told her to ‘get in, nerd,’ Dr. Jane Foster realized things were much, much worse than bad.

\---

“You look good!  I mean, for someone who’s been stuck in bumfuck Russia.”  Darcy laid on the horn as they drove into a snarl of traffic heading out of the airport.

“Vladivostok isn’t Siberia, you know.”  Jane pushed her hood back, pulling the zipper a few inches down.  “But thank you for the backhanded compliment.”

“Jeez, Jane.  I thought a year with the Russians would mellow you out.”  Darcy turned her head, focusing on Jane when she really should have been paying attention to the traffic.  “Did you even drink a sip of vodka?”

“I had a sip.  I had a few sips,” Jane huffed.  So it had never been much more, despite Natasha and Clint’s many efforts to persuade her otherwise, in the raucous celebrations after each victory.  “I’m not a total stick in the mud.”

“Well, no sticks here, in the mud or up asses,” Darcy said, glimpsing back to the road, where the traffic was starting to ease.  “We’ve got a lab together-”

“Please don’t remind me.” Jane had drinking slightly more than a sip of vodka when the Marshall informed her of her working arrangements.

“And you are gonna love Hong Kong.  We are going to get the stuff out of your shirt  _and_ those horrible sweaters I’m sure you packed.”

Jane snorted.  “Fashion advice from the woman who still thinks kaiju tattoos are ‘in’.”

Darcy just laughed as she crossed three lanes of traffic, causing an impromptu symphony of horns and sharp curses.  Jane gritted her teeth, biting her lip as her leg protested the damp and Darcy’s lack of driving skills.  “Man, Jane, it’s just like old times!  This is gonna be the most awesome apocalypse ever!”

\---

At least five tanks of rancid new kaiju parts, waiting to be splashed on the lab floor.  Jane glared at the tarp-covered transports from beneath her hood, wishing she could will them - and Darcy - back to Sydney.

No, Sydney was too close.   

Vladivostok might have been a frozen wasteland in the middle of nowhere, but God, Jane had enjoyed the quiet.

“Jane!  Jane!  C’mon, let’s get these bad boys all settled in,” Darcy said, heading the odd little parade.  “You’re gonna, well, you’re not gonna love the lab, but it has a kind of dystopian charm.”

“I don’t care what it looks like,” Jane said, hobbling towards the service lifts.  “As long as your entrails stay as far away from my things as possible.”

“Jane-”

“Dr. Foster!  How many times do I have to tell you?”  Jane half-raised her cane.  Maybe a solid thwack to her shins would make the woman remember.  

“Fine, fine. Dr. Foster.  Jeez, the world might end and you’re still making a big deal about a piece of paper.”  Darcy watched over the kaiju parts like a mother hen as they were loaded into the service lift.  “But like I was saying, since when did I ever mess up your side of the lab?”

“Oh my God, where do I start?”  But before Jane could begin listing the many, many transgressions, Marshall Pentecost, followed by his constant shadow (and brilliant engineer) Mako Mori, slipped in the closing doors.

And, Jane noted with a lump in her throat, so did Thor Odinson.

*** 

September 28, 2017

Los Angeles Shatterdome

 

_“Do people even know there’s a power crisis?” Jane cupped her cramped, frigid hands together and blew into them.  “Who the hell turned down the thermostat-”_

_“I’m afraid he’s right here.  So feel free to mete out any horrible punishment you have in mind.”  A bemused, entirely apologetic, and very unexpected British voice interrupted her tirade._

_Jane turned around, wincing, hoping the gesture was enough to show she wasn’t entirely serious.  The thermostat hijacker was tall, slender, with medium-length black hair and warm, intelligent green eyes.  “I didn’t really mean that, about actually doing anything.  I mean, I could maybe kill you with my brain,” she added, offhand._

_Those green eyes brightened even more.  “Someone with decent taste in television.  Sharing an office might not be so horrible after all.”  The man shook his head and extended a lanky hand.  “I’m so sorry.  Loki Laufeyson.  Neuroscience.  Dr. Siever’s office is rather overflowing with equipment, and he seems to regard it as more important than a human colleague, so he mentioned there might be a spare desk down here.  I promise I’ll be considerate.  Save my need to work in an icebox, evidently.”_

_“Jane Foster.  Jaeger coding and theoretical mathematics,” she replied, shaking his hand.  His grip was firm, his fingers almost shockingly cool.  “Working on a program to analyze the static we get from the Breach when it’s resting, see if we can make a truly early detection system.  Give the pilots more time, help the cities evacuate faster.”_

_Angry voices began to rumble down the fall, and Jane scrambled to close the door before the storm made it to their office. “God, these pilots need a lot more help than an early detection system," she said._

_Loki raised a brow.  “Those were Gypsy Danger’s pilots?  Drift compatible pilots?”_

_Jane groaned and ran a hand through her hair.  “That’s what the PONS says.  Thor - he’s the younger brother - he’s decent.  A good guy, really, and halfway up on Jaeger science, but Tyr’s a bit of a...he’s kind of….”_

_“An asshole?”_

_Jane bit down a laugh.  “That’s putting it mildly.  A shatterdome in the middle of celebrity heaven?  It’s a disaster waiting to happen, and when it does, I bet you it’s gonna be Tyr.”_

***

“Mr. Odinson, this is our science division.  This is Ms. Darcy Lewis, who handles the biological research-”  

“A pleasure, Ms. Lewis,” Thor said, with a polite nod to the slack-jawed biologist.

“Oh no, the pleasure is totally mine.”  Darcy pushed down her glasses and gave Thor a smile Jane knew far too well.  “So you’re a pilot?”

“Was a pilot.”

“That’s too bad.”  Jane blinked as Darcy expressed something akin to sympathy.  The woman’s staggering ignorance of the men and women who fought the Kaiju wasn’t embarrassing, it was criminal.  “Cause I bet you looked hot in that armor.  Probably even hotter out of-” Darcy let out a strangled yelp as Jane ground the end of her cane into her foot.

“And you remember Ms. Foster.”  Thor smiled at her, happiness, exhaustion and a weariness beyond a twenty-hour flight in his eyes.  She did her best to keep her hand steady, because if there was one thing she didn’t want to add to those emotions, it was pity.

“Of course,” Thor said, voice deep and warm, and Jane is thankful that years of working on the Wall haven’t taken everything good from him.  

“Wait, wait, you’re Thor Odinson! Yamarashi’s Thor!”  And then Darcy was rolling up a sleeve to show him the garish inking of a creature Thor and Jane remembered only too well.

*** 

October 14, 2017

Los Angeles Shatterdome

 

_“We’re going to have to get a new set of pilots.  I’m sorry, Mr. Odinson, but we’ve been through every possible candidate in the L.A. area.  None of them are compatible.”  Loki was running on strong tea and Thai takeaway at this point, but he still held his ground._

_Thor Odinson wasn’t hearing it._

_“My brother might have thrown away his career, but I’m not going to give up my Jaeger.”  Tyr had taken a few hits too many at a party on Malibu Canyon and had crashed his motorcycle on the way back to the Shatterdome.  It was a miracle he wasn’t dead, but a severe concussion meant he wasn’t piloting any time soon.  Or ever again, possibly._

_“It’s not your Jaeger, it’s the PPDC’s.  You’d leave the entire city undefended just because you can’t get along with anyone?”_

_“Is that what I said?”_

_“It’s certainly what you’re implying.”_

_Jane slammed a book onto her desk.  “You two have been at this for days.  You’re getting to the point where you’re finishing each other’s arguments.  And you’re getting to the point where I can hear the two of you in my head more than myself.” She grumbled and sipped at a mug of lukewarm tea.  “If all you’re going to do is fight, take it to the Kwoon.  Maybe you’ll both beat each other unconscious.”_

_\---_

_The Shatterdome wasn’t any different from Loki’s upper school.  All someone had to do was shout ‘fight,’ and everyone came running._

_It was an odd contest: Thor in close-fitting sweats and tank top, Loki in a button-down shirt, sleeves rolled up, trousers rolled at the cuffs.  Thor had a bo, Loki a pair of yantok._

_“We don’t have to do this,” Thor said, looking at Loki as if he’d break him without even hitting him._

_“Getting nervous now?”  Loki smirked, even as he tried not to look too closely at how muscled Thor’s arms were._

_“I’d rather not explain to Jane how I broke her office-mate.”_

_“If you broke my jaw, she might be grateful.”  Scientists, maintenance, engineers, and LOCCENT crew and officers circled around, and Loki saw a few folded bills change hands._

_They bowed. Thor’s bo came down in a fast, powerful overhead strike, but Loki raised his arms, crossing his sticks in an X shape and hooking the staff before it could strike him.  He swept his arms out, breaking Thor’s hold.  But before he could hand a strike, Thor had deftly slid out of place._

_A few more bills passed hands, and Loki hoped at least a few bettors had their odds on him._

_Thor swung the bo in a swift, low sweep but Loki’s feet were already in the air.  He landed, lithe and graceful, or so he thought, and struck back in rapid, short arcs, his sticks meeting the staff as he slowly pushed Thor back on the mat._

_Loki was vaguely aware the Shatterdome staff weren’t exactly a quiet audience - the J-tech crew roared their enthusiasm for their pilot, and the scientists had some rather clever cheers for him.  But they didn’t break his concentration as he and Thor circled, struck, and rolled, each point matched quickly by the other, when one of them actually managed to score a hit._

_Loki wasn’t as out of practice as he thought.  He’d just gotten back on his feet, a last-minute dodge keeping the staff from a solid hit to his ribs, when he glimpsed Jane at the door, brown eyes wide._

_He glanced at Thor, who’d clearly seen her too._

_Loki might be a somewhat brilliant neuroscientist who prided himself on not being an oafish troglodite, but damned if he didn’t want to win this thing._

_The fight sounded like a drum roll, sticks and staff struck each other so rapidly, yet always in a rhythm Loki and Thor had both fallen into.  They lunged, feinted, rolled, and hopped yet no matter how much more energy they gave to the fight, neither of them could win._

_“What the hell is going on?” Marshall Morrow’s sharp alto did manage to break Loki’s concentration, and he and Thor lowered their weapons.  Neither could even bother to look chagrined; Loki regarded Thor with a sort of wondrous confusion that he saw reflected in the other man’s face._

  
_“What’s happening,” Jane said, as she claimed a stack of bills from one of the J-Tech crew, “is that Gypsy Danger has its pilots.”_

_Pilots who were tested two days later when Yamarashi came out of the Breach._


	2. full-time drama part-time credit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy and Mako bond over Max, even if his owner Tony Stark is an ass; flashback!Jane, Thor, and Loki adjust to life in the Icebox, as Tendo finds a way to keep the place sane; flashback!Jane and Darcy meet over kaiju entrails and lots of shouting; and present-day Darcy does something stupid for science - and to piss Jane off.

“Is your data still predicting a double event?”  Jane could hear the frown on the Marshall’s face.  He stood behind her, leaning in to peer at the luminescent screen, and the visualization of the Breach.  

Jane grunted and pushed herself to her feet, grabbing for the cane propped up against her desk.  The Marshall stepped back, but didn’t make any other concession. 

His refusal to coddle her was one of the many reasons the Marshall had Jane’s undying respect.  He merely stood and watched as she made her way to the boards, pointing out the relevant equations with the end of her cane.

“99.1 percent certain,” Jane said, ignoring Darcy’s snort from the far, smelly side of the lab.  “As for the timing, I wish I had that level of certainty.  But it’ll happen, sometime within the next week.”  

“Mmmm.”  Jane turned back, watching the Marshall as he bowed his head, clasping his hands behind his back.  

“Have you found a co-pilot for Thor - for Gipsy Danger yet?”

“At least one, though I hope another option presents itself.”  His voice was low, and Jane realized he meant Ms. Mori.  Jane felt her chest tighten - the Marshall adopted her after Tokyo, and Jane remembered the little girl, sitting politely in the Anchorage control room (well after Knifehead), little legs swinging, feet not touching the ground.

The Marshall wanted to save the world.  They all did.  She didn’t blame him for wanting to save someone he loved and the world at the same time.

***

Anchorage Shatterdome

January 4, 2020

 

_“It’s a little big,” Jane said, pushing the sleeves back, knowing she had to look like a little kid, drowning in Loki’s parka._

_“It’s this or waiting for the PPDC’s requisition process, and we all know the blazing speed they have.”  Loki zipped up the parka with his deft, unshaking hands.  They’ve all been adjusting to the Icebox - as much as anyone could adjust to frostbite and darkness and an excess of dishes focused around canned meat, but Loki had an easier time, weather-wise.  Hence his genorous loan of the parka, despite Jane’s many refusals to take it._

_“I’m a mathematician.  You’re the big shot Jaeger pilot.” Jane heard Loki snort.  “You need this more then me.  I’ll just wear lots of cardigans.  And drink lots of tea.”_

_“Jaeger pilot, yes.  As for the big shot, you’re thinking of my brother-”  It wasn’t the first time Loki - or Thor, for that matter - had slipped.  Their bond was as strong as any sibling pair in the Ranger corps, if not stronger.  Thor’s parents, Jane knew, insisted on talking to Thor and Loki when they call in.  Frigga, Thor’s mom, has even knit Loki a scarf, a sumptuous length of black and green alpaca, flecked with gold._

_Loki might have insisted he didn’t feel the cold, but he wore that scarf everywhere._

_“What I mean to say is you are one of the most brilliant minds the PPDC has, and your health is equally important.”  Loki fastened the top of the coat, then flipped the hood over her head.  “There.  You’re the picture of warmth.”_

_“A ridiculous picture of warmth.”_

_“Oh, it’s not so bad,” Loki said, and it was a lie, but it was such a sweet lie she didn’t call him on it._

_Jane could barely see anything past the furry fringe in her eyes, but she could hear Thor’s sudden laugh, and the equally fast swat of Loki’s hand against his arm._

_One Drift and three fallen Kaiju later, the two of them were never apart for long._

_“I’m sorry,” Thor said, pushing the hood off her face.  “You’re just hilariously adorable.”_

_“I’d just settle for professional and warm,” Jane said.  As she started to divest herself of the chartreuse monstrosity, Tendo bounded into the room, with a miracle of miracles.  A hard drive loaded with 200 TB - about eight years worth - of shows and movies for worn out pilots, scientists, admin and staff to binge watch in the agonizing waits between attacks._

_Thor and Loki began their familiar bickering, full of the clipped sentences of Drift shorthand.  Where Thor and Tyr had raged, Thor and Loki needled and cajoled until one of them (usually Thor) gave up, exasperated but never angry._

_And so Jane knew, even before Loki could make his case, she and the pilots were getting a bowl of popcorn and a Firefly marathon tonight._

***

“Mako! Mako!” Darcy skittered to a halt and waved the envelope above her head, sucking in lungfuls of oxygen.  Gyms weren’t exactly Darcy’s thing.  “I’ve got the weapons….tissue….analysis...oh my God I’m so out of shape!”

Catching a glimpse of the Wei triplets, playing basketball in their close-fitting tank tops, Darcy thought she should ask to join in on a game sometime.  She grinned as she thought of other, more enjoyable aerobic activities.

“I could have come to the lab,” Mako said, shaking her head, Max the bulldog slobbering at her heels.  

“But then I couldn’t see you and this guy,” Darcy said, kneeling down to rub Max’s now exposed belly.  “Who’s the cutest thing in the Shatterdome?  You are!”

“C’mon, I’m at least ten times cuter than him.”  Yeah, Tony Stark, the hotshot Striker Eureka pilot checking her out the entire flight from Sydney might be cute, but Darcy would take Max anyday.

“Maybe,” Darcy said as she stood back up.  “But at least Max is housebroken.”  She waved the folder in the direction of Stark’s smug face.  “I have actual science-y stuff in here for Mako.”  

“Thank you, Darcy.  I know you and Dr. Foster have been busy,” Mako said as she took the folder and began leafing through the papers.

“Jane’s scribbling away on those billboards, so I guess she’s busy with her precious numbers.  Me, I’m unlocking the secrets of the Kaiju.”  Darcy grinned and pulled at the tie slung loosely around her neck.  “I’ve got this idea, it’s a little crazy, but it could get us everything we’ve ever wanted to know about them.”

“Unless your idea tells us how to kill them faster and keep the Breach closed after I blow it to hell, really don’t care.”  Tony smirked, and Darcy wished she could punch the look right off his face.  

“You should tell the Marshall your idea,” Mako said, and Darcy was so glad there were pilots like her and Thor, and the Weis, and maybe Romanoff and Barnes - they were weird and kept to themselves but they hadn’t been dicks to Darcy, which bumped them up in her book.  

“I will.  I so will.”  Darcy beamed, pushed out her shoulders.  “Oh, and congrats!  Look at you, a big grown-up Jaeger pilot now.”

Mako answered with a smile and a gracious bow of her head, but Tony rolled his eyes so hard Darcy could hear them.

Darcy shook her head.  “What the hell is your problem, dude?”  

“I don’t have a problem,” Tony said, reaching down and clipping a leash on Max’s collar.  “When I have a pet, I keep it safe and keep it in its place.  I don’t make it a pilot.”

“You ass-”  Darcy raised her hand but Mako’s fingers whipped around her wrist, keeping her from following through.  Tony just smirked and walked away, Max following after a few tugs at the leash and a few petulant whimpers.

“Darcy, don’t,” Mako said, and even though the woman was a damn master of calm, Darcy knows the comment had to hurt.  “We don’t need a fight, not now.”

“He’s not even worth it.”  Darcy snorted.  “But his dad better take him out to the woodshed, because if he does that in front of your big, beefcake, google-eyed co-pilot ?  Oh, there’s gonna be a fight.”

\---

Jane was perched at the top of her ladder when Thor came in.  She slid down, managed not to wobble on the dismount, and smiled awkwardly as she reached for her cane.

“Money must be tight if the PPDC still hasn’t gotten you a jacket,” Thor said, his hands stroking the parka, draped over her desk chair.  

“I’ve been in Vladivostok the past year or so.  It came in handy.  Besides, it’s a really warm security blanket.”  Jane made her way, slowly and painfully, over to the man, as if there was any other way.  “And you know how they keep the air condition at the L.A. dome.”

“Is that where you went, afterwards?”

Jane nodded.  “I stayed in Anchorage for a while, but then…”  She reached her desk, leaning in it to take the weight off her hip.  Her hand, planted on the aching joint, was the only answer she had to give.

“The Marshall told me you’d be here.  He didn’t mention what happened.”

“God bless that man.  Not because you don’t deserve to know,” Jane added.  “But I see people looking, and their pity, and I know all they want to do is ask how it happened.  I should tell them something fantastic, like I took on a Kaiju, armed only with a piece of chalk and an abacus.”

“If anyone could kill a Kaiju with an abacus, it’d be you,” Thor said, and he closed a hand around hers.  Jane was so not into casual touching, but Thor was a friend and practically a brother and his hand was so big and steady.  “It’s allright.  You don’t have to tell me.”

“It was an accident.  A stupid accident, and it took me six months just to get to this” Jane said, waggling her cane, speaking before her brain thinks the better of it.  “Didn’t have anyone to save me the second time.”

***

Anchorage Shatterdome

February 9, 2020

_One second Jane was standing, talking about ways of reducing signal noise on the Breach monitors, the next she was lying beneath Loki, a metal shelf crashing into the floor besides them - where they had just been - with an almost deafening noise._

_“Oh my God.”  It was amazing Jane’s mouth could even work, or any of her, really.  Her heart was fluttering in her chest, her hand suddenly slick and cold.  Loki shifted, no longer lying on top of her, but he stayed crouched by her side._

_“Jane, are you all right?”  His hand touched her brow, and it stayed there._

_“I’m not dead,” she said, closing her eyes and wriggling hands and toes.  “Nothing broken, I think.  Maybe a little bruised pride.”  She groaned as she started to sit up.  “And a bruised ass.”_

_“Thank goodness,” Loki says, and as she sits up, his hand moves to her shoulder, then her arm, and then her hand, fingers closing around fingers._

_“What about you?  You could’ve been killed!  Or hurt!  You can’t just go around saving people like that.”_

_“Said the rescuee to the Jaeger pilot,” Loki said dryly.  “Saving people is somewhat in my job description.”_

_“Saving tens of thousands of people.  Millions of people.  Not one person.”  Jane blinked and looked away, but didn’t let go of his hand._

_“I was supposed to stand there and let you get crushed to death.”  Loki raised a single brow.  “You, who coded the Mark I Jaegers, who’s predicted the last three Kaiju landings, and is going to do countless other amazing things with that magnificent brain of yours.”_

_“There’s dozens of other scientists out there in the program and - okay, maybe a handful of them can do what I do, but I’m nothing special.”   Jane felt herself wanting to pull away, but they were trapped until someone with a torch could clear the door.  Where could she go except her own head, and that wasn’t exactly a welcome place right now._

_“Do you hear yourself?  You’re not replaceable, and you’re worth saving, whether it’s from a Kaiju or some incredibly shoddy building standards.” Loki squeezed her hand.  “How can someone so brilliant not understand this?”_

_Jane’s hand curled into a fist beneath Loki’s, and she felt his fingers brush against hers in comfort.  “My father called this morning.  It’s been a few years since we’ve talked.  We don’t-”  Jane swallowed and looked down.  “We don’t get along well.  He just wanted to remind me how much I’m wasting my genius and talents in the PPDC, which is kind of funny because he didn’t think I had either when I was growing up.”  She closed her eyes, and wished the shelf would have hit her.  At least knocked her unconscious._

_Loki closed his eyes.  “I..didn’t exactly have a fantastic childhood either,” he said.  “Every now and then, it still sneaks up on me.  When Thor and I first Drifted - it was the first time anyone else knew.  I was embarrassed - no, I was humiliated, but Thor told me that being able to overcome that sort of upbringing just made him admire me even more.  And so I’m telling you now.  Everyone in this Shatterdome admires you, from Thor and I to the Marshall to the woman who brings you tea whom you never fail to thank.  That is a person worth flinging myself in front of furniture for.”_

_Jane had stopped crying and her eyes were mostly not-red by the time Thor, Tendo, the Marshall, and a welding crew cut the blocked door open.  Thor bounded over the fallen shelf, scooping a slightly sheepish and resigned Loki into his enormous arms - then yanking Jane into the embrace.  Tendo and the engineers helped them across the debris, and the Marshall clapped Jane on the arm, relief and gratefulness in his dark eyes._

_This was her family, Jane decided, accidents of birth be damned._

***

“So now that I have wowed you with the wonder that is my brilliant Kaiju genetic analysis, I have an idea.”  Darcy grinned and put her hands on her hips.  “No, a plan.  One that means we finally get to see what the Kaiju want.  To get inside their heads.”

“Unless you somehow picked up a degree in evolutionary psychology in your spare time, I don’t really see how you can tell us what a Kaiju is thinking.”  Jane frowned, looking at the Marshall to make sure Darcy stayed as small a distraction as possible.  

“I don’t need one of your fancy pieces of paper,” Darcy says.  “Because I have part of a Kaiju brain,” she said, tapping on one of the tanks, “and when I add me, and a PONS device - poof.  Instant Kaiju knowledge.”  Darcy scritched at the tendril that snaked out from the hunk of brain floating behind the glass.  “Isn’t it awesome?”

Jane shut her mouth, which had dropped open at the mention of the PONS.  “Drifting with a Kaiju is your brilliant idea?”

“I know!  I mean, why didn’t we do this before?  Besides the whole lack of Kaiju brains,” Darcy said.  “So, Marshall.  If you just send down a device, and make some cute technicians, we can get this done today.”

“It’s too dangerous,” Pentecost said.  Jane let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding.  “Drifting alone is dangerous, but with a completely alien creature…”  He shook his head.  “I’m not going to sign your death warrant, Ms. Lewis, and for what would likely be nothing useable.”

“What would likely be nothing….see, part of you thinks this could work!”  Darcy turned her puppy dog stare on Jane.  “He likes you, for some reason.  Tell him it’s gonna work!”

“Why would I do that?  Because I think it’s the stupidest plan I’ve ever heard of,” Jane said, hand gripped tight around her cane.  

Darcy balled up her hands into tiny fists, looking like an angry, tattooed kitten.  “Neither of you get it! Hooking up people to giant robots probably seemed stupid, but we did it, and we kicked ass.”

“Ms. Lewis, I do get it, contrary to your opinion,” Pentecost said, being much too nice for Jane’s liking.  “It’s a risk to you, and it’s a security risk to this dome and the entire world.  My answer’s no, and nothing is going to change that.  If you can continue your work with the weapons team, that is a project far more worth your time and your...obsession.”

“Ugh!” Darcy at least waited until the Marshall left to throw her tantrum.  Jane watched, one eyebrow raised, as Darcy slammed her fist against her entrail-covered and be-slimed worktable.  “Some people just don’t appreciate genius.”

“It’s not genius, it’s you and your kaiju groupie-ness.”

“Just because I have a teeny bit of respect for them-”

“Oh yes, microscopic.”

“Like I was saying, I respect the Kaiju.  Maybe I think they’re a little bit cool.  It doesn’t mean I want them to win.”  Darcy wiped a slime-slicked hand across her thigh.  “And this could make a difference.  Don’t you get it?”

Jane grumbled and pushed herself off the desk, making her way to the door.   “No, Darcy.  And no one ever will.”

***

Los Angeles Shatterdome

June 5, 2022

_Jane wished they would all stop staring._

_She could manage well enough in the mess one-handed, but every other day someone tried to yank the tray out of her hand, to help her, supposedly. Only after she stated she didn't ask for help, with an inflection colder than any Anchorage gale, would her do-gooders leave her alone._

_Much easier to take meals in the lab; the prescreened Thai place she, Loki and Thor loved still delivered to the Shatterdome._

_The first night she ordered, they asked if she wants her usual. Larb - Loki's favorite, drunken noodles (Thor ordered them Thai hot), and mango fried rice (extra seitan - shrimp is hit or miss these days), coconut tofu soup and crab cheese wontons - imitation crab was still plentiful._

_No, she said, a hitch in her voice. Just the rice and a cup of soup.  That’s right, one cup._

_She’d cried into the soup, but the coconut milk hid the taste of the tears._

_\---_

_It had been such a harmless e-mail. A biologist in K-science needed someone who could code. Lima and Sydney had poached most of L.A.’s computer scientists, and their replacements were slow in coming._

_Or, if you believed the rumors murmured in the mess hall, they were never coming._

_Jane didn't know if she'd hobbled into a lab or a horror movie. Tanks upon tanks glowed with an otherworldly blue light, appropriate given they were filled with Kaiju limbs, organs, and tissues._

_"If there's a Dr. Lewis here, I think I'm in the wrong place." Jane flinched - was that a Kaiju eye, looking at her - and started to back out of the lab._

"No, no, it's the right place!  Most awesome place in the whole Shatterdome.  So you’re Jane!" A young woman with unkempt dark hair and a left arm littered with tattoos squeezed out of a gap between two tanks. "And it's just Darcy.  Waste the best years of my life in a PhD program when there's these bad boys to study? I don't think so. Screw MIT. Did my time, got the master’s, did an internship here the summer after, never left."

"It's not a waste," Jane said, trying to stand a little straighter.

"I'm sure it was great for you! Rules, deadlines, having a bunch of stick up their asses rip your work apart. That's just not my style."

Jane lifted her cane and waved at the chamber of horrors. "And this is?"

"Damn straight," Darcy said, beaming.  "C'mon, why not be a science rock star? Check out the ink!" Darcy thrust out her arm at Jane.

"You...you got a tattoo of a Kaiju?!"

"Not just any Kaiju - Meathead.  My lady is awesome - I'm sure she could do some sweet equations for you or something." Darcy smiled. "You might have a whole Mrs. Rogers sweater vibe going on, but I think you have an inner badass in there somewhere.”

Jane raised a brow.  “Have you been hitting the preserving fluid?”

“Not lately,” Darcy said.  “But c’mon.  You are a seriously still water so I bet you’re deep.”

“This is ridiculous.”  Jane pivoted around, but the cane slipped, and it was too late to try and catch herself.  The cane flew out of her hand, and Jane fell, hard, on the cold metallic floor.  The acrid smell attacking her senses let her know the puddle wasn’t water.

“I am so sorry!  Oh my God, are you okay?”  Darcy’s hand was in her face; Jane pushed it aside as she slid around on the slime-covered floor, trying to sit up. Trying to look less pathetic.

“I would be if you could keep your damn Kaiju bits off the floor!” Jane groaned as she pushed herself up to her knees.  God, her hip was on fire, and she wanted to scream.  Or bash Darcy’s head in with her cane, which was frustratingly out of reach.

“Okay, I’m a dumbass, but seriously, are you hurt?  How many fingers am I holding up?”

Jane gritted her teeth. “I don’t want your help.”

Darcy rolled her eyes as she reached down to pick up Jane’s cane.  “I know you don’t want pity.  I’d be the last person to pity you, seriously.  So, here’s this,” she said, laying the cane easily within Jane’s reach.  “And a hand - but only if you need it.  And another me saying how much of a dumbass I am.”

Even if Darcy Lewis was a kaiju groupie and a slob, she had been the first person in L.A. who’d treated Jane normally.  Or whatever passed for normal with Darcy.

“I think three times is good,” Jane said, wrapping one hand tight around the cane, and reaching the other up to Darcy.

“Thank God,” Darcy said as she pulled Jane slowly upwards.  “I really suck at the whole humility thing.”

“I can tell,” Jane said as she finally rose back to two feet and a length of wood.

“Well, if I ever trip on a bunch of Kaiju bits,” Darcy said, with a lopsided smile, “you can totally point and laugh.”

***

Jane had managed to wrestle the makeshift PONS off Darcy’s head, but she wouldn’t stop shaking, a steady trickle of blood from her nose.  If Darcy would open her eyes - and damn it, why didn’t she open her eyes - Jane knew she’d see the red ring around the iris.

Neural overload.  Darcy’s body jerked, nearly bringing down her and Jane both.

“You aren’t dying on me!  You are not getting out me telling you ‘I told you so’ that easy,” Jane said, a finger pressed to Darcy’s neck, feeling the pulse flutter at her touch.  Jane kept her hand there, terrified the jack-rabbit beating of Darcy’s heart would stop if she did anything else.  "I can't even leave you alone in here!  Of course you were stupid enough to do this….”

“Brave.  Not stupid, brave,” Darcy groaned.  Actually groaned, and her red-rimmed eyes fluttered open.  

“You are going to shut up and stay still until I get the Marshall,” Jane said, grunting and pushing Darcy upright and towards her chair.  Darcy sank into it with no protest, barely able to keep her head up, and her hands shook when Jane pressed a cup of water into them.

Jane was angry.  No, she was furious, and it propelled her across the Shatterdome, her cane beating out a rhythm like a typewriter.  

But if she let the anger fade, even for a second, there was something else.  Fear, almost to the point of terror, and relief.  Gratitude Darcy hadn’t died there in her arms, or been a corpse Jane had come back to.

And so when she told the Marshall Darcy had built a PONS out of garbage and Drifted with a Kaiju, it was with the hope two things would happen: that the Marshall’s punishment would be swift and severe, and he would save Darcy from herself.

 


End file.
